Here I am again at a crossroads in my life's path. As soon as I figure things out lately, the rug is pulled out from under me and I am left scrambling for a plan, a job, money and confidence in my decisions. I feel okay today. That may be due to the spring-like atmosphere outside of my window or simply to more positive thinking. I guess going to church yesterday morning reminded me that I am not completely in control of my life. That I have just got to trust that things will work out for the best. Since I went to Korea, I also have the knowledge that I can handle just about anything. I also have a great support group that helps me when I feel helpless. I am keeping busy with newspaper stories, a book and a potential job. The only thing with the potential job is I am not sure if I want it. It would mean moving to Milwaukee and sort of starting over, when all I want to do this summer is completely start over. I really didn't expect things to be so complicated when I returned home from Korea. I miss my days in Korea when I had fewer responsibilities and I was more carefree. Even though I am not going to work right now, I feel weighed down by life's worries. Today is an exception. I feel more carefree and open to possiblities. I have just got to trust in myself and in the greater power that things will work out for the best.
"The soul should always stand ajar, ready to welcome the ecstatic experience."